PRE-FRONTAL CORTEXT
Here is a question worth sitting with: are your moods and emotions entirely your responsibility?
The answer, right now, is not yet. And here is why.
As a preteen or teenager, you are missing a component of your brain that has not fully developed yet. It is called the prefrontal cortex, a thin, ribbon-like structure that acts as the control center for emotions, logic, and creativity. For most people it comes fully online around age 21.
Without it, imagine driving a race car with no speedometer and a gas pedal tuned way too high. That is what being a teenager actually is, physiologically speaking. It is not a character flaw. It is just biology.
Here is the good news.
You have heard of puberty. You may have heard of adolescence. What you may not have heard is this: adolescence is your cocoon.
A caterpillar goes into a cocoon, grows wings, and becomes a butterfly. You are in your cocoon right now, and what you are growing is a prefrontal cortex. When it arrives, fully developed and activated, it will feel like waking up one day with a brand new superpower.
Because that is exactly what it is.